Friday, June 21, 2013

The Birth Story of Zander James De Filippis

Well… I don’t really know where to start.  Where my due date was June 2nd from the doctor and the 4th from a website I was using by June 5th I was a little antsy.  I really wanted to have this wonderful child and experience becoming a mother.   That afternoon Nick and I went to lunch at The Center Street Grill and ordered a spicy BBQ sandwich.  I had heard that spicy food can help start labor and Nick’s Co-worker said they ordered this sandwich and had their baby that night.  We enjoyed it very much and when I got home I took a bath.  After my bath (4:00 pm, Wednesday, June 5) I felt a trickle and thought maybe my water broke.  I called the hospital to ask what to do and the nurse said to take an hour walk.  So I decided to walk to A&W and back to the house.  While walking I felt a little more liquid and called Mel and Shayla to gain some insight into what was going on.  When I got to A&W I got a small Root Beer Freeze.  I love those.  Then walked home and all the way I was timing my contractions.  3 to 4 minutes apart and I thought I was doing pretty good.
                When I finally got home I checked and I was indeed wet.  So I called Nick and told him I thought he could finish work and sometime this night we would be able to go to the hospital.  We were both so excited and ready to welcome Zander into the world.  I called mom too and I am pretty sure I heard her cry on the other end of the phone which started me crying when I got off the phone.  I think it just hit me how my life was about to change and we were going to be taking care of another human being.  9 months and finally we were going to become parents.  It was scary to think about.
                I searched on Netflix to find a show that might make me laugh and distract me from the contractions.  Nick got home right when I started “An Extremely Goofy Movie” and we watched it together.  It was funny but the first part of that movie Max is going off to college and Goofy remembers back on his memories of Max growing up.  I just broke down!  I couldn’t stop crying because we would now be going through all this too.  Watching a child grow up, start school, teach them how to ____, see them graduate, go on missions, get married, it was all just so overwhelming and I didn’t want to miss any of it.
                At 7:00 we went to the hospital.  We were all packed, my birth plan ready to follow, and lots of energy and excitement.   We made one extra stop at Jamba Juice on the way there.  I got Orange-a-peel I think and Nick got Passion Fruit something.  Then we went to the hospital.  We were put in a room and checked to see where I was at.  Frustratingly enough I was still at a 2 and they couldn’t confirm that my water did break.  I had been sick for the past few days and when they took my temperature and I had a bit of a fever.  They started the IV and monitors and put me on some anti-bionics.  The contractions continued and at 8 I was dilated to a 3, at 9 I was at a 4, and around 10 I was at a 5.  I was stuck at a 5 for a few hours.  During this time we enjoyed (in-between contractions) watching Duck Dynasty.  The nurse said that we had a few options to see if it would help us progress.  Pitocin, Doctor could break my water, I could walk around or just wait longer.  We tried walking around and had no success.  Around 2 or 3 my doctor really wanted me to take the pitocin, but I said no and would rather have my water broken.  The doctor wouldn’t let me get in the tub because of my fever and if my water was broken they wouldn’t let me because of infection. 
                Well, before she left her home my water broke.  Now I know what to expect/feel.  It is really like a quart of water that just comes out.  Wow!  I had about 3 different gushes and I felt there was a bit of progress.  Around 6 I was progressed to an 8 and the contractions were getting a lot worse.  They were so close and getting stronger.  My doctor came in and said how this was her day off and I would have to work with the doctor on call, Dr. Benedict.  Honestly I think that is why Heavenly Father had me wait till Thursday to have my baby.  I haven’t been too happy with my current doctor. 
                The nurse checked my when I got to an 8 and said, “I don’t think your water has broken yet.”  What?!?!  How is that possible?  We waited for an hour or two debating on pitocin or having the doctor break my water, or just wait.  The pain was almost unbearable and I was scared of both options because I knew it came with a stronger pain.  Finally nothing was progressing and I was getting really tired.  I asked the doctor to break my water.  When he did it another huge gush of water came.   Along with that gush came stronger contractions and a ton of more pain.  Nick had been a huge support through the whole thing.  He kept telling me how good I was doing and how much he loved me.  It was exactly what kept me going.
                I think it was around 10 am Thursday, morning when the pain was so strong that I couldn’t handle it.  My legs and arms were shaking so bad I couldn’t relax my uterus.  It was so scary.  This is when I started praying out loud.  It occurred to me that the only person who could actually take away the pain was Heavenly Father and so I kept saying, “Heavenly Father, please help me” “Give me strength” “don’t leave me” “Show Zander where to go” “Please help me relax.”  I kind of felt silly talking out loud like that but at this point I really didn’t care.  I also realized that I never want to have another child ever again.  I told Nick I changed my mind and I don’t want a baby.  I wasn’t sure if this was all worth it.  Finally after 20 hours of labor, I gave in and said, “GIVE ME THE EPIDURAL!  FAST!!!!!!!”  The doctor came in and had to give me the epidural during contractions because they were so close together.  He did a fabulous job and within 10 to 15 minutes the pain was getting better and I wasn’t screaming any more.  I was screaming quite a bit and felt bad for anyone who could here.  I found out later that my parents were in the room next to us and could hear all my groans and moans and screams and crying.  I can only imagine what they went through as well.
                From 12 to 2 we were instructed to just relax.  Nick and I both got naps in and felt better after.   Then for the next hour and a half I pushed during contractions and finally Zander came into this world looking GREAT.  Honestly he was perfect.  I was prepared for an ugly baby, discolored, and mis-shaped.  But he was great!  We got an hour with him and then I left Zander and Nick with the doctors to run some tests because I had the fever during labor.  I went upstairs and hung out with mom, dad, and Mel.  About an hour and a half later we found out that Zander had to stay in the NICU.  It was so depressing but we were hopeful that he could come home quickly.  We ended up staying until Tuesday morning.  It was awesome coming home and now Zander and I are doing a lot better.  Nick and I are so happy and excited to watch our baby grow up.

                I know that I wanted to go natural and I did all that I could to accomplish that, but I am also very grateful for the health professionals and the epidural that was used to assist in helping me have Zander.  I am sure at some point I will be able to forget the pain and will want another baby… but not too soon.







 Melanie took the above photos.  She did a great job!


The little white cone on top is his IV from when he was in the NICU.  Jenn took these photos.

2 comments:

  1. Yea!!! Squeaker Pictures:)Zander needs to play with Grampa and Grama soon!

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  2. :') oh goodness that is quite the story. Great job Steph~ We are so excited to meet him!

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